Good...Bad...

Today, was a good day at the Doctor's office...The blood looked good today...so that means we just might have the week off for good behavior...So many emotions are involved in this process...I try as hard as I can to stay up beat and positive.....Today...I was given a blow by someone I love...A blow that went straight to my heart and ripped it in two...I have no idea what this loved one is thinking...except they are only thinking of them self...but they have taken upon them self to deny us the pleasure of things that we love...they find it to hard to be around us....to hard to be around illness...to hard to bring them self here to visit...To hard to allow the littlest of loves to know our company....My heart is broken today...as I have so many other heart breaking things going on and now at this the Christmas season I have been hurt beyond measure....
I do not understand...how anyone I love so much could hurt me so badly...

4 comments:

squarepegperson said...

oh Pattie, that sounds so hard! I've been thinking about you so much lately.and so sad to read this.

wild how life is..the good..the bad, like you titled this post..and the post before..someone being so tender (had to giggle about you thinking you'd need to "rip michael a new one" until you found out he didnt do the shoveling)..

but right now..just sad with you missy..glad about the good day with the dr visit, but so sad about the loved one...

Barb said...

Pattie, I am so sad for you. How could someone you love so much deny you that expression love --- except out of fear or something not realistic? I'm sorry; it's not for me to judge. My heart hurts for you and your loved one. I pray that they become enlightened and know how much you need them at this time.

On the good side, that's good news from the doctor. Yea, Michael!

Brenda said...

i'm wrapping my arms around you...................
love you,
brenda

Luna said...

Oh Sweetheart, this is so hard! I'm sad that you were hurt so much, so deeply. The loved one is acting out of fear... fear is not rational, compassionate, kind, it is raw, jagged, fight or flight response. I'm sorry that your loved one took the "flight" route, you on the other hand have taken the "fight" route by getting up each morning putting one foot in front of the other and getting through what you need to each day. I admire you so much dear sister! xoxoxo Keep fighting!