And once again we wait....

The bone marrow biopsy took place today....It is a painful procedure...but Michael tolerated it well.
The Doctor however was not pleased with some of the things that he has neglected to tell me...and her....He has lots of bed sores from sitting to long....and he is retaining fluid from the prednisone...so she is starting to cut back on the dosage that he takes....reminding him that with this cut back he will also start to lose weight once again....that the 25 pounds that he has put on is mostly due to the drug he is taking....I have noticed a great deal lately...eyes wide open so to say....but he is beginning to look very gray in color....he is beginning once again to sleep for long lengths of time...he is beginning once again to resemble the man who I first took to the Doctor....the one before the chemo...
I don't know what it is about waiting ....but it is a very difficult thing to do.(we live in such a fast ...I want it now world)...and yet, I am perfectly aware that one needs to stay in today....to cherish the moment....to not look backward or jump to far ahead....and yet waiting for the results for a week or more is going to be difficult.... (instant gratification)...So I occupy my thoughts tonight...at this late hour...I come here to get some of this out of me so that tomorrow I can face the day head on with vim and vigor! And I will look for the light...for the pleasures...for the happiness of the day instead of focusing on what the outcome to this test is going to tell me...do to me...
Tonight I am fearful....so I will go off to slumber....because tomorrow....when my feet hit the floor....it is going to be another day...